This week was heavy
It sat on my chest like an iceberg
Slowly melting into hot, sticky grief
I think loving me must be messy
Because as much as I try to
Pull it together
Wipe my face
Wash my hair
Put pants on
It always comes seeping out
It oozes from my pores
And I can’t help but think
Of your pristine white shirt
You are warm drapery
Across my back
I am melting into your
Methodic rumbles
Warding off this viscous sleep
For the thought of watching
Yours
I am always trying to explain
How much I love you
I am always trying to crack this
Invisible code
And I am looking up new words
And I am sorting out new meanings
For the old ones
But nothing is making sense
Nothing is as pure, as concentrated
As the feeling I get
When you touch my lips
When you lose your guard
When you protest beautiful
To my overwhelming no
When three words don’t even begin
To sum up the feeling I feel
For the very first time
What am I to do but search
My endless mind
I used to grow away from sunlight
Like the warmth would hurt
My sallow bones
Like those purest beams of gold
Would scorch my open soul
I used to hide away from warmth
Like darkness was a cloak
Against the wear and tear
Of being spoon fed gold
I used to shun myself from brightness
Like cold corners were enough
Under bed sheets not my own
I would close my eyes
Deep in stolen lust
I would shield myself from beams
Like I could live inside delusion
Like lack of sustenance were cure for
Loving shadows like a man
Until you kicked up my surroundings
My flower bed of dust
You held my cracked and bruising stem and pallid skin so gently
I couldn’t feel that you were fixing
Me until it was done
You changed my colors
I am green and brand new
And rose red and pink with passions
That I never knew
And you were nothing like dirt
Or pain or darkness
You were blue
Like skies
And never ending waters
And I am growing into you
Cat Eyes and Lippy 